Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
