I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
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