dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
