i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
