Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
