i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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