Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
