And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
