Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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