thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
we're so committed to being not committed
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Randomize
