Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
