I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
