we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
