I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
