You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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