I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
We have started to decorate penises.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Randomize