He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Randomize
