I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
