Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Randomize
