Dual....:-)
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
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