It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
