From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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