Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
My nipple is on Facebook.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
