next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
it was like eating out sand paper
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Randomize
