found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
