When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
