The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
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