playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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