i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
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