is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize