I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
