So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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