Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
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