new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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