I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
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