Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Randomize
