im so drunk with asians
where?
always
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
