Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
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