this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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