So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
