So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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