He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
