Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
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