By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize