No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
