I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
