I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize