thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
This is not my ceiling
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
