sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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