I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
