it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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